Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize
