I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
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