Cold hands, warm shart.
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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