THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize
