i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
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