That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
