we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
