There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
and you fell through a lawn chair
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
