I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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