used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
how drunk are you?
Several
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
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