He is such a slut. More and more my type.
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
