All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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