My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
