This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize
