dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize
