i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
Randomize
