I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
Randomize
