After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
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