I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
Randomize