Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
birth control should be required to get into college
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
I have grass duct taped all over my body
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
The struggles of a small town man whore
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
