i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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