Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
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