i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
Randomize
