We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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