If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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