Pants 0. Shit 1.
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
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