So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
