So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
I am available for nakedness
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
