Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
