Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Your penis caused this!
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
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