I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Randomize
