walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
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