Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
i would punch a child for taco bell
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
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