It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
Randomize
