Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize
