There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I'm too high and old for this...
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
