if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Randomize