She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
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