She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Randomize
