I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
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