And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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