I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
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