i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
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