The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
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