love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
Randomize
