ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
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