i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
