Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
