Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
I think I sprained my soul last night
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
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