'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
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