HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
Babe, the 4 years we've been together have been amazing. Will you marry me?
are you seriously doing this over text message
hahaha no, but i am dumping you.
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Randomize
