this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
